Thursday, October 07, 2010

It will be better when...

This has been a mantra of mine for as long as I can remember. At least since I entered my 'adult' years starting with college. And although it helps me get through life, I hate it. I feel like I'm wishing my life away.

It was almost exactly a year ago that my mind was focused on how much better I'd feel once the new baby was in my arms and not in my belly. Then it was how I'd feel better once I was getting more sleep. Which changed to thoughts of how much more I would get done once Lydia was taking solid scheduled naps. Then I focused on how much nicer it would be when the weather got warmer. Then, after the super hot summer we had, how nice it would be to spent time outside when the weather cooled off. And I looked forward to Madeline starting school with more hope and desire than I can explain in a blog post.

So what is it now? Life will settle down after Lydia's birthday. But will it?

But it never gets easier. There is always something next. Always something else that stands in the way of me feeling like I am on top of life.

So far, my family has not starved, no one has gone without clean clothes (although Madeline has come very close to going without unndderrppannttss*, which isn't a surprise to some (I'm looking at you Auntie Maine)) and my house isn't imploding from dust bunnies and dirty dishes.


Ok, instead of blogging about feeling behind I need to work on Tuesday's to do list.

Yep, Tuesdays.

*I'm sorry I don't want pervs finding my blog by googling the correct spelling of that word so unndderrppannttss it is...



Michelle said...

Except for major events I've given up on to-do lists. I am working hard on enjoying more, fretting less. And worrying about dust bunnies can wait until Devon is older and doesn't want to play with me. Maybe then I'll care about them. Hang in there, snuggle M and L and enjoy your iced tea instead of using it to fuel energy for your list. Those are my 2 cents.

Molly said...

Hey, at least you made a list. I have a list in my head and the first item is to make a list. You're a step ahead!

You're also very awesome.